Embrace Your Freedom: How the "Let Them" Theory Can Transform Your Life

In life, we are constantly surrounded by opinions, judgements, and expectations from others. Whether it's at work, in our personal lives or on social media, it can feel overwhelming to navigate through the noise.

Mel Robbins, a popular motivational speaker and author, offers a refreshing perspective to help you break free from the weight of others' judgements with the powerful concept: the "Let Them" theory. This summer, she shared this idea on  Instagram and the video went super-viral.

What is the "Let Them" Theory?

The "Let Them" theory is a mindset that encourages you to stop worrying about what others think or say about you. It’s about letting go of the need for approval and embracing the idea that people will always have their own opinions. The core message is simple yet profound: Let them think what they want. You have no control over their thoughts or perceptions, so why let them control your actions?

In other words, she says, "If somebody is not showing up how you need them to show up, do not try to force them to change. Let them be themselves because they are revealing who they are to you. Just let them. Then, you get to choose what you do next."

This concept is designed to help you stop seeking validation from others, allowing you to live a life that’s true to yourself—free from the paralyzing fear of judgement.

Why is This Important?

In a world that constantly bombards us with opinions—whether it’s through social media, workplace dynamics, or even from our closest friends and family—the pressure to conform can be overwhelming. We often find ourselves questioning our decisions, second-guessing our worth, and holding back from pursuing our goals just to avoid the discomfort of criticism.

But here’s the reality: You will never be able to please everyone, and trying to do so will only drain your energy and self-esteem. The more you allow others’ opinions to dictate your choices, the more you’ll lose sight of your true potential. The "Let Them" theory teaches us to embrace our individuality and focus on what truly matters to us.

How Can the "Let Them" Theory Change Your Life?

1. It Frees You From the Fear of Judgement

One of the most liberating aspects of the "Let Them" mindset is that it removes the paralyzing fear of being judged. Imagine waking up every day knowing that the opinions of others no longer have the power to stop you. Whether you're working on a personal project, stepping into a new relationship, or pursuing a career change, the fear of judgement often holds us back.

With "Let Them," you realize that everyone has their own lens through which they view the world. And their opinions are often based on their own experiences, biases, and insecurities—not on your true worth. Once you let go of the need to please, you are free to pursue your path with confidence.

2. It Encourages Authenticity

When you stop seeking validation from others, you start living in alignment with your true self. You no longer have to put on a mask or pretend to be someone you’re not just to fit into a mold that others expect you to occupy. The "Let Them" theory empowers you to follow your passions, speak your truth, and embrace your uniqueness without worrying about whether or not it will be accepted.

Living authentically is a huge key to long-term happiness and success. When you stop trying to please everyone, you will find that your personal and professional life flourish in ways you never thought possible.

3. It Shifts Your Focus Back to What You Can Control

The reality is that you can’t control how others think or what they say about you. However, you can control your response. The "Let Them" theory teaches you to focus on your own actions, thoughts, and values rather than getting bogged down by external noise.

When you direct your energy toward what you can control—your own mindset, actions, and choices—you reclaim your power. It helps you stop wasting time and energy on things you can't change and instead channel it into building the life you want.

4. It Helps You Build Resilience

The more you practice "Let Them," the stronger and more resilient you become. Not every decision you make will be met with approval, and that’s okay. When you stop depending on others for approval, you become more self-reliant and emotionally strong. You begin to develop the inner resilience to withstand criticism without letting it derail you from your goals.

5. It Reduces Stress and Anxiety

The constant worry about what others think can lead to high levels of stress and anxiety. By adopting the "Let Them" mindset, you reduce the emotional toll of worrying about judgements. When you’re no longer tethered to the opinions of others, you open up space for peace and mental clarity. You’ll find that your stress levels decrease as you begin to focus on your own happiness and growth.

How to Implement the "Let Them" Theory in Your Life

1. Identify Your Triggers

Think about the situations where you feel most concerned about others’ opinions. Is it at work, during family gatherings, or on social media? Understanding your triggers will help you recognize when you're falling into the trap of seeking approval.

2. Challenge Your Fears

Ask yourself: “What’s the worst that could happen if someone criticizes me?” Often, the fear of judgement is more intimidating than the reality. When you challenge these fears, you’ll realize that the potential consequences are not as dire as they seem.

3. Set Boundaries

When you stop seeking approval, you’ll begin to set boundaries that protect your emotional well-being. This might mean stepping back from toxic people or limiting your exposure to situations that make you feel judged or unworthy.

4. Affirm Your Self-Worth

Remember that your value doesn’t depend on others’ opinions. Practice affirmations that remind you of your worth and strengths. Embrace the truth that you are enough, just as you are.

5. Celebrate Your Authenticity

Instead of seeking validation, celebrate your own uniqueness. Each step you take toward living authentically brings you closer to the life you’ve always wanted. Embrace your individuality and be proud of the person you are becoming.


The "Let Them" theory is more than just a mindset—it’s a call to live with confidence, authenticity, and freedom. By letting go of the need for approval and accepting that others will always have their opinions, you release yourself from the chains of judgement and open the door to a life that’s true to you. So, the next time you feel the pressure of others' expectations weighing on you, remember: Let them think what they want. You’ve got your own life to live. Focus on building a life that brings you joy and fulfillment.

Embrace the "Let Them" mindset and take charge of your happiness. For support on your journey, connect with Michele Wolf, Registered Psychotherapist, at Aware Within-Collingwood Psychotherapy.